Friday, February 06, 2004

Brain Dump 2002, Part 3

I believe in God. Here’s a glimpse into that.

“Standing on a tan-sanded beach, watching glimpes of gold sunlight shimmering on pure blue ocean water.
Driving at tree-line elevations, seeing snow-capped peaks, layered in three dimensions, but even with eye level, as far as I can see.

Watching deadly-force water pressure whiz by inches from my face at the edge of Niagara, volumes of water I rarely see standing in a pool, gushing forth at frantic MPH to distances stories below.

It is places like these I have come face-to-face with God’s fingerprint, His reflection on all of creation. At these places, confronted with the bigness, the complexity, the beauty, the ordered chaos of creation, at these places & times I know there is a God. Actually, I now that I don’t know – that I can’t know, what is. I am too small, too simple, too much a part of the whole, too much controlled by something else, too much the object of a subject, too much the result of a cause, too much the attracted being of an ultimate consummation – to know – anything for sure or in full. And it is in this position of not knowing – of not being capable of knowing – that the reality of God becomes subtly obvious (or perhaps I should say “powerfully hidden”).

So, as if it were a big deal, I believe in God. How could I ever know enough to do anything else, really?

Who is God? What is my relationship to God? How does my life relate?

I will ask God – and I have asked God – “Reveal Yourself – show me the truth about You – to the degree that You would have me know. I will listen. I will obey.”

The story of Jesus has so far been the answer. The story of Jesus as foreshadowed in the story of Israel. The story of Jesus in His life on earth, His teachings, and His demonstrations of the Kingdom, His death, His life, His eternal reign. The story of Jesus as it has been lived out by His people (Catholic, Orthodox, and Protestant), though imperfectly ever since. The story of Jesus as lived out in my family, in my house church, in the lives of those who have written hundreds of thousands of pages I have read the past few years, in the lives of my closest soul mates.”

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